TFW No More Up Only

These are bullish days in crypto.

Well, they were. This week’s wild sell-offs allow a moment of space to look back on a heady yesterday when many felt the good times would never have a hiccup again.

This article is excerpted from The Node, CoinDesk’s daily roundup of the most pivotal stories in blockchain and crypto news. You can subscribe to get the full newsletter here. 

On May 3, amid the gains, MakerDAO Foundation alum Mariano Conti tweeted out the following challenge:

Challenge accepted.

For younger readers, The Police were a great 1980s band that launched the legend of the great solo act known as Sting. One of the band’s classic songs is 1978’s “So Lonely.” Most of the lyrics of “So Lonely” consist of crooning “so lonely” over and over with various vocal and guitar rejoinders.

But it does have two proper verses. Revised for crypto, those were more than enough to evoke the spirit of these times. It will require other talents than those I was bequeathed, I’m afraid, to turn this into a recorded track.

Until the charts see green again, here’s a tune meant to evoke optimistic days:

‘Up Only’

Someone told me yesterday
That when you sell your ETH for gains
It’s just like saving for a rainy day
Locking in your savvy ways

But I can see the coming flip
DeFi making TradFi trip
And all my artsy NFTs
Disrupting hipster snobbery

Up only
Up only
Up only
Up only

Up only
Up only
Up only

Up only
Up only
Up only

Up only
Up only

Now Bitcoin’s losing dominance
And Vitalik’s taking prominence
I’ve twelve and twenty staked on 2*
For when devs say that 1 is through

Taking gains at 8%
Unless I have slash event
You give your heart, I run my node
It proves my stake will not erode

Up only
Up only
Up only
Up only

Up only
Up only
Up only

Up only

Up only
Up only

Up only
Up only

Up only (I see it)
Up only (I see it)

Up only (I feel)
Gotta hold, gotta hold

It’s gonna go!
Up only
Up only
Up only

Up only
Up only

Only, ETH’s only
Up only
Up only
Up only

Up only
Up only

Holding only!
Up only
Up only
Up only

I see it!
Up only

I hold
I hold

I hold hold hold
I hold hold hold

I hold
I hold

I hold hold hold

It’s up only
Up only
I’m gonna hold

Hold only
Up only
I only hold
I only hold

Up only (I’m holdin’)
Up only (I’m holdin’)
Up only (I’m holdin’)
Up only (I’m holdin’)
Up only (I’m holdin’)
Up only (I’m holdin’)

* Running an Ethereum 2.0 validator requires a minimum of 32 ETH to run. Ethereum 1.0 used proof-of-work, not proof-of-stake. At first the old chain will run as a part of Ethereum 2.0 but many expect it to someday wind down.